Archive by Author

A Quick Note on Quixtar

Yes, it is a pyramid scheme.  Sorry.  The only difference between Quixtar and, say, an email chain letter fishing for idiots to send you their kids’ college funds, is that you make everyone in the pyramid switch from regular supermarket toilet paper to Amway brand toilet paper.  That’s how the cash keeps flowing.  Every poor […]

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Ah, the Ponzi Scheme

Rick Perry.  Ponzi scheme.  I have this terrible suspicion that the Republican party is going to be very sorry for labeling Perry with that one if he actually wins the nomination and has to run for President.  Social Security is one of those sacred cows that occupies a…how do you say it…”strange” position in our political dynamic.  Everyone thinks […]

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Commentary Forum: Ben Tompkins, 9/13/11

Know your role, shut your Facebook page to students By Ben Tompkins I would be very, very surprised indeed to hear any serious professional educator strongly disagree with the decision of Dayton Public Schools (DPS) to ban teachers from adding their students as friends on Facebook. I’ve been involved in professional music education for the […]

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Shat Trek part 2: Courage in the Face of Illness

The filter through which William Shatner sees the world is so unbelievably distorting that he borders on schizophrenic.  He is literally the only person in the universe I can think of who can see a set of clear, undeniable events, and actually experience something totally, narcissistically different from the rest of humanity.  For instance, many […]

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HTTAP – Bachmann’s $2 gas (simple)

Yes, there were lots of numbers in there.  I’ll give everyone a simple example of capitalistic forces. Coke costs, for simplicity, $1 a can.  Maybe it’s high, maybe it’s low, whatever.  You’ll quickly see this makes no substantive difference for my argument.  Coke sells 27,375,000,000 gallons a year.  That’s the equivalent of 292 billion cans a year.  […]

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How to think about politics – Principle 1: Contemporary example. Michelle Bachmann’s $2 gas.

*I recently realized I have been misspelling Michele Bachmann’s name.  This is because I hate her.  I will not be changing it in any previous work because I absolutely refuse to engage in any behavior that further validates her as a human being beyond what is necessary to point out the depth of her ignorance.  […]

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How to Think about Politics – Principle 1: Is it more important to think or to feel good about information?

I have my favorite news outlets.  NPR is nice.  I also like BBC, CNN, and I’m more than happy to read the NY Times and the Denver Post.  I feel that these news agencies are relatively objective in their portrayal of information, and relevant to local, national, and international affairs.  I believe this because over […]

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How to Think about Politics – opening: You don’t have to be a genius

I am not a political genius.  I will be right up front with that one.  However, one very often feels like one has to be a savant or constantly read the newspapers and old history books in order to gain any kind of understanding of the constantly shifting political landscape which pervades our every waking moment.  While neither […]

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The Hardest Low Blow in the History of Boxing

Perhaps some of you have heard of Andew Golota?  He was a giant Polish mofo who on several occasions contended for the heavyweight title back in the nineties.  He fought Mike Tyson and Lennox Lewis, for the heavyweight championship of the world.  These fights went like this: Tyson/Golota:  Tyson W – KO 2 – Golota quits after […]

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Santa Cruz hippies – Hit and Run

I wanted to add this on as a corollary to the Santa Cruz ass crack incident.  So my wife and I were driving into a rehearsal one morning, and I we were both pretty wiped out and grumpy because after about a week of constantly rehearsing new music you’re pretty tired.  I developed a new […]

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News of the weird: 12/16

By Chuck Shepherd Dying to get a date Like many in society’s subgroups, people who work in “death” industries or […]

Advice Goddess: 12/16

By Amy Alkon American idle My girlfriend is beautiful, highly intelligent and interesting. She’s smart for a living (as a […]

The Docket: 12/9

Strange, but true: Dayton’s police blotter, reported verbatim Researched and reported by Charles Grove Photo: The Miamisburg Community Holiday Event […]

Jingle ’Burg

Miamisburg Holiday Parade returns By CC Hutten Photo: The Miamisburg Community Holiday Event and Parade begins at 11:30 a.m. on […]

Advice Goddess: 12/9

By Amy Alkon Belittle Richard My girlfriend says she likes that I’m smart but says I can be “on” too […]

News of the weird: 12/9

By Chuck Shepherd Lead Story – TMI Kansas lawyer Dennis Hawver was disbarred in November for his comically bad (24 […]