The Right Power
By Ben Tomkins
Ladies and gentlemen, I call your attention to the case of Darnell Young. A 17-year-old boy walking the land as an abomination to the Lord! An evil boy who engaged in every manner of homosexuality, gayness, faggery and all things unchristian. For as it was written in the Bible by some random guy 2500 years ago, and therefore is literally applicable to the world in which we live today — the same way women should be sent to live in a tent outside of town when they’re on their period and men with crushed genitalia are going to hell — “A man shall not lie with another man. It is an abomination. – Leviticus 18:22” In the name of Jesus Christ we pray. Can I get a right power?
Now this young boy received his due punishment by the hand of his fellow classmates day after day after day. They beat him, abused him, insulted him, threw bottles and rocks at him — all because he committed the sin of being created a homosexual, ironically, by God. Can I get a smite power?
Ten times this young sinner’s mother appealed to the school administration to intervene, and yea, ten times they ignored her. For when a black boy is harassed and beaten at school in 2012, it is a hate crime of the first order, but when he’s a faggot you’re basically doing him a favor. For if one has not been successful praying away the gay, then the next best thing from a social and moral standpoint is to allow his classmates to slay away the gay through the administration’s blind, abject indifference to the situation. Can I get a slight power?
And I tell you, it was a kindness the administration and his schoolmates did for this young black faggot, though their means were harsh. For according to some crazy bitch in Lincoln, Nebraska, homosexuals molest school boys in order to give them AIDS and commit anal sex with their P-E-N-I-S in order to enjoy rupturing their partner’s intestines and killing them. Also, ass-licking causes sepsis, and gays enjoyed watching Christians mauled by lions in the coliseum because they’re sadistic. Can I get a fright power?
But, I say unto you, this young abomination to the Lord had a mother who loved him despite his queerity. Blind to the administration’s higher purpose of letting gangs of students beat the shit out of him every day, she decided to give him a non-lethal stun gun to protect himself. Oh, how weak are those of the rib of Adam! Of course, she could have sent him to a private school or home-schooled him, for as we all know, Ann Romney was a hard-working stay-at-home-mommy with a multi-million dollar husband and a full-time nanny to boot, and that situation is directly analogous to the life of a lower-middle-class black mother in Indianapolis. Can I get a flight power?
So finally, my children, you understand why we felt it was appropriate to expel him from school. For when a terrified 17-year-old has a state-mandated obligation to spend 6 hours a day in a virtual prison where he is abused, tormented and beaten, and he is then handed a stun gun by the only woman and authority figure in the world who loves him unconditionally, we must cast him out from among us! Sure, we could punish his mother as the adult in the picture, or realize that we have allowed the situation to spiral completely out of control and use this as an opportunity for serious intervention and dialogue in our community. Yes, we could acknowledge that bigotry-driven hate crimes perpetrated by students against students will push individuals and communities to extremes of survival, and moderate our reaction accordingly in an empathetic and progressive manner. At the very least we could attempt to punish the six kids who surrounded him and threatened to beat him up in a similar fashion. Can I get a might power?
But nay! We must make an example of the wages of sin and ruin this poor boy’s life by expelling him from school. By piling our sins on a goat and whipping it out of town, it allows us to perpetuate our blind faith in something stupid written in a book thousands of years ago, and avoid thinking about our world in a more inclusive, loving and tolerant way.
Benjamin Tompkins is a violinist, teacher, journalist, and critically acclaimed composer currently living in Denver, Colo. He hates stupidity, and generally believes that the volume of one’s voice is inversely proportional to one’s knowledge of the issue.
Reach Ben Tomkins at BenTomkins@DaytonCityPaper.com.