Conspiracy Theorist

Shut the government down for real, please

 by Mark Luedtke

 If you believe the government-controlled media, what I call the accomplice press, the sky is falling because the government shut down. Nothing could be further from the truth.

Imagine how wonderful life would be if government really did shut down. No more U.S. soldiers would be killed overseas. They would no longer make enemies that come to the U.S. to kill us in blowback terrorist attacks. We could live in peace.

Imagine if the NSA stopped reading every email and listening to every phone call. You could communicate with your family, friends, business associates and anybody else in civilized privacy. Imagine if DEA SWAT teams stopped kicking in doors, shooting dogs and sticking guns in the faces of children. They wouldn’t break into the wrong house and kill old ladies anymore. Imagine if the government stopped trying to force Obamacare down our throats at the point of its gun. Imagine if the Federal Reserve (Fed) stopped counterfeiting $85 billion a month, invisibly stealing wealth from the people and enriching the bankers at our expense. Imagine if the IRS shut down and we could keep 100 percent of our paychecks.

For the vast majority of Americans, net taxpayers, really shutting down the government would improve our lives astronomically. It would also quickly benefit people trapped on welfare by freeing them to re-engage with their fellow Americans in the cooperative economy that improves the lives of everybody.

The standard of living of every American – except for our rulers – would skyrocket overnight. Crime would virtually disappear. The quality of our food, water, housing, health care, education, infrastructure and everything else would rapidly improve, and prices would fall just as rapidly. Society would never be perfect, but it would be fantastically better than it currently suffers under the jackboot of government.

Of course, our rulers will never walk away from the trillions of dollars they steal from us annually, so they won’t shut the government down. This so-called government shutdown is a farce. None of government’s programs of oppression will be shut down. Both parties are maneuvering for political gain. They furlough a small portion of federal workers, those proclaimed unnecessary, but they’re all unnecessary, then the accomplice press pretends the sky is falling and tries to assign blame.

President Obama wants us to believe this is some unprecedented stunt by Republicans. NPR reported otherwise: “Since a new budgeting process was put into place in 1976, the U.S. government has shut down 17 times. Presidents Jimmy Carter and Ronald Reagan each dealt with six shutdowns during their terms in office, lasting anywhere from one day to 2 1/2 weeks. The last actual shutdown came in 1996 — though the government came close during budget negotiations in 2011.”

The sky didn’t fall any of those previous times, and it won’t fall now. In fact, except for those furloughed workers who no longer receive a paycheck stolen from taxpayers, it will improve. The Dayton Daily News illustrated the economic fallacies claimed by the accomplice press: “If the government shuts down at midnight, it will cost $5 million per day in lost wages throughout the Miami Valley.” This is presented as bad for the economy when – like if the mafia shut down some operations – it’s actually good for the economy. This means $5 million per day in resources that typically are stolen out of the productive voluntary economy and squandered in the parasitic political economy will now remain in the hands of wealth creators. This will improve the economy. The same is true across the country. This furlough will at least slow the relentless decline of our economy, and it might spark a short burst of economic growth.

This is another reason shutdowns never last. The more and longer the government furloughs, the better. Our rulers don’t want people to know furloughs boost the economy. The Associated Press reported even Wall Street doesn’t melt down during a shutdown: “The S&P 500 rose 4 percent between Nov. 13 and Jan. 6 [1995-1996], suggesting that investors were focused elsewhere. The stock market had just started its five-year, technology-fueled bull run, during which the S&P 500 more than doubled.”

The Fed fueled the dot-com bubble then, and it’ll continue to fuel the tremendously larger bubble during this shutdown. But the real benefit to the economy of a furlough is on Main Street, where the freed up resources are used to create real wealth.

But, whatever short term economic gains may be realized from a furlough, the Christian Science Monitor reported the government typically steals them back: “And all those federal salaries that aren’t being paid? No savings are likely. Although furloughed workers are not guaranteed reimbursement, in past shutdowns they have received retrospective compensation for hours lost.” So, furloughs are generally paid vacations. They target popular programs like federal parks, the Air Force Museum and the Washington Monument in an attempt to create maximum anger in the public. This is so common, it’s named the Washington Monument Ploy.

Let’s not fall for the ploy. Let’s demand a real, managed shutdown before a chaotic one is forced on us.


The views and opinions expressed in Conspiracy Theorist are the views and/or opinions of the author and do not reflect the views and/or opinions of the Dayton City Paper or Dayton City Media and are published strictly for entertainment purposes only.

 Mark Luedtke is an electrical engineer with a degree from the University of Cincinnati and currently works for a Dayton attorney. He can be reached at


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Reach DCP freelance writer Mark Luedtke at

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