King green

By Mark Luedtke

You might think Elon Musk walks on water, or at least fuels his cars with it, because that’s the image the media portrays of the Tesla Motors CEO. Every article about Tesla drips with hype, but don’t believe it.

Reuters reports, “Tesla Motors Inc (TSLA.O) reported a steeper than expected quarterly loss on Wednesday on higher spending at its vehicle and battery factories, and said adjusted profitability could be within sight if the company meets its delivery goals. The 13th straight quarterly loss for the Silicon Valley electric carmaker underscores the financial hurdles that hamper it while it takes on increasingly ambitious goals – a 10-fold ramp of vehicle production in three years and the recent plan to acquire solar panel installer SolarCity Corp (SCTY.O).”

Tesla lost $293 million last quarter. Tesla’s first profitable quarter was in 2013, 14 quarters ago. That means the company has never had a profitable year, yet Tesla keeps going strong. If you or I owned a business that never showed a profit for years, the IRS would call it a hobby and take away tax deductions, but if you’re a big-time plutocrat and crony capitalist in bed with President Obama and his phony green economy, you can post losses forever.

This begs the question of how Tesla stays afloat. The answer is tax dollars, and not just for Tesla. The Los Angeles Times explains, “Tesla Motors Inc., SolarCity Corp. and Space Exploration Technologies Corp., known as SpaceX, together have benefited from an estimated $4.9 billion in government support, according to data compiled by the Times. The figure underscores a common theme running through [Musk’s] emerging empire: a public-private financing model underpinning long-shot start-ups.”

It never ceases to amaze me how leftists continually create, support, and fund the things they claim to hate like crony capitalists.

“If Elon Musk’s various projects are so Iron Man fabulous, why do they all need so much government ‘help’?” asks independent auto reviewer Eric Peters. “Shouldn’t Tesla – and SolarCity and SpaceX – be able to stand on their merits… if they actually have merit?”

Peters argues Teslas don’t have merit. “Tesla fanbois – and Musk himself – will tell you all about the virtues of his electric cars. They are sleek and speedy. This is true. But they are also expensive (the least expensive model, the pending Model X, will reportedly start around $35k, about the same price as a luxury sedan like the Lexus ES350) and come standard with a number of significant functional deficits such as a best-case range about half that of most conventional cars and recharge times at least four to five times as long as it takes to refuel a conventional car,” he continues. “That’s if you can find a Tesla ‘supercharger’ station. If not, then the recharge time becomes hours rather than half an hour.”

Peters explains Tesla’s business model. “Tesla does not make money by selling cars, either,” he explains. “It makes money by selling ‘carbon credits’ to real car companies that make functionally and economically viable vehicles that can and do sell on the merits – but which are not ‘zero emissions’ vehicles, as the electric Tesla is claimed to be (but isn’t, actually, unless you don’t count the emissions produced by the utility plants that provide the electricity they run on, or the emissions produced mining the materials necessary to make the hundreds of pounds of batteries needed by each car).”

The government also pays part of the purchase price for Teslas, and the company still can’t make money. This is the epitome of a crony capitalist business model based on phony government edicts. Tesla couldn’t exist without government paying Tesla our tax dollars, turning Musk into a billionaire along the way.

Musk understands this. That’s why he pushes for a self-serving carbon tax and a revolt against fossil fuels.

The hype surrounding Musk isn’t because of his supposedly green product. Elio Motors produces a car that gets 80 MPG and sells for under $10 thousand, but it gets no love from Obama or his leftist accomplice press because leftists love rich cronies while pretending they don’t. They love people who get rich off other people’s money, stolen by the government.

But Obama’s green bubble is about to pop,  too. Musk’s SolarCity stock recently plummeted. The same will happen to Tesla and his hyperloop boondoggle. The sooner Musk’s 15 minutes of infamy ends, the better for us all.

The views and opinions expressed in Conspiracy Theorist are the views and/or opinions of the author and do not reflect the views and/or opinions of the Dayton City Paper or Dayton City Media and are published strictly for entertainment purposes.

Reach DCP freelance writer Mark Luedtke at

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Mark Luedtke
Reach DCP freelance writer Mark Luedtke at

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