He comes to you from the future

PASADENA, CA - JULY 20:  Comedian John Heffron poses during his portrait session at The Ice House Comedy Club on July 20, 2015 in Pasadena, California.  (Photo by Michael Schwartz/WireImage) *** Local Caption *** John Heffron PASADENA, CA - JULY 20: Comedian John Heffron poses during his portrait session at The Ice House Comedy Club on July 20, 2015 in Pasadena, California. (Photo by Michael Schwartz/WireImage) *** Local Caption *** John Heffron

John Heffron at Dayton Funny Bone

By Jennifer Hanauer Lumpkin

Photo: John Heffron will perform Dec. 10-13 at Dayton Funny Bone

John Heffron has been telling jokes for more than 20 years, his first gig being emcee at Main Street Comedy Showcase on the University of Michigan campus. A Detroit native, Heffron later spent years as sidekick to radio’s Danny Bonaduce on Q95.5 before going on to win the second season of Last Comic Standing.
Today Heffron can be caught spouting gamey bits of humorous knowledge in even more medium’s as the author of 2013’s “I Come to You From the Future: Everything You’ll Need to Know Before You Know It!” and as a guest on several podcasts including WTF with Marc Maron, The Joe Rogan Experience and Skeptic Tank. He now has his own podcast, The State I’m In, on All Things Comedy. And if that weren’t enough, now you can get his single “Let’s Have a Date Night,” an R&B jam featuring Elan Noelle, the money from which goes to Heffron’s charity, Ramp Up the Laughter, an organization that purchases portable ramps for wounded service members.
Despite juggling his many ventures with a touring schedule and the holidays, all while under the suffering the seasonal flu that comes a-calling this time of year, Heffron took the time to converse with Dayton City Paper in anticipation of his upcoming appearance at Dayton Funny Bone. Twinkling from inside the haze of a NyQuil-induced miasma, some gems from John:
Getting into the holidays here, what are they like in the Heffron household? Quiet holidays at home? Traveling to see family?
John Heffron: It changes every year. It’s kind of, “We were with your family last year, so this year we are with mine.” For some reason, I travel to everyone. No one comes to me.
“I Come to You From the Future” has something for everyone. Have you ever found yourself wanting a similar book written by, say, a 90-year old with information you could use now? Could you write that book now as a sequel to “I Come to You From the Future” from the perspective of a 90-year-old John?
JH: If I write an advice book at 90, I’ll probably just give bad advice. Screw it, I’m 90.
What role has your family (biological or acquired) played in the comedian you’ve become? Your father and your wife play in frequently. What has their reaction been to your career?
JH: My dad likes the stories. My wife says the only way shes knows if something is bothering me is if she comes to a show and listens to what I’m complaining about. Apparently I don’t express myself in real life.
During my preliminary research (i.e. reading your Wikipedia page), I learned that Phyllis Diller once referred to you as “the cute one.” How’d the stars align on that one?
JH: She was a judge on Last Comic Standing. We may or may not have hooked up. I’ll never tell.
“Date Night” is insanely catchy. How did this collaboration with Elan Noelle come about? Why the decision to have sales support Ramp Up the Laughter? Are there more grooves coming soon?
JH: I always wanted to write a song. I watched YouTube vids. As you can [see], I wrote it in about two minutes. Then I went to a website where people will do stuff for five bucks. I think I paid her (I’ve never met her) 100 bucks to sing that song. It’s as good as anything on the radio now.
What’s next in this diverse career of yours? Maybe a screenplay for a feature film? Who would you like to collaborate with?
JH: My biggest goal now is to research any of my great-grandparents and see if they left me any money I don’t know about. I’m putting out a new album. I have an idea for a show. I’m hoping an elf will just do it for me and when I wake it’s all ready.

John Heffron will perform Dec. 10-13 with shows Thursday and Sunday at 7:30 p.m. and Friday and Saturday at 7:30 p.m. and 10 p.m. at Dayton Funny Bone, 88 Plum St. in the Greene Town Center. For tickets, visit daytonfunnybone.com. For more about John, visit john-heffron.squarespace.com.

Jennifer Hanauer Lumpkin is a writer and amateur cartographer living in Dayton, Ohio. She has been a member of PUSH (Professionals United for Sexual Health) since 2012 and is currently serving as Chair. She can be reached at JenniferHanauerLumpkin@DaytonCityPaper.com or through her website at jennerlumpkin.com.

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About Jennifer Hanauer Lumpkin

View all posts by Jennifer Hanauer Lumpkin
Jennifer Hanauer Lumpkin is a writer and amateur cartographer living in Dayton, Ohio. She has been a member of PUSH (Professionals United for Sexual Health) since 2012 and is currently serving as Chair. She can be reached at JenniferHanauerLumpkin@DaytonCityPaper.com or through her website at jennerlumpkin.com.

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