Sign Language Astrology

L eo (July 23-Aug. 22)

Leo Christina Perri uploaded her song, “Jar of Hearts,” to youTube on June 30. It was then used in a dance performance on So You Think You Can Dance, and subsequently rocketed up the charts. A couple weeks later she was doing national TV appearances and hundreds of thousands of people were downloading her song and knew her name. This is the dream, right? Unfortunately, most of us don’t get lucky like that. However, putting yourself out there is the first step to even making it possible. You could do more of that—and you should. This week, make showing the world what you’re all about your top priority.

Virgo (Aug. 23-Sept. 22)

Researchers at the University of Montreal wanted to compare the views of men who didn’t watch porn with those who did, but hit a bit of a stumbling block: they couldn’t find any men who didn’t watch porn, partnered or single. Your own search may prove equally fruitless and unrealistic. It’s important to get a reality check here and make sure what you want is actually viable, considering the specific circumstances of your life. It may be based on ideals that are incredibly artificial and, ultimately, inappropriate. If you can’t see that for yourself, check in with someone you’re sure will tell it like it is—then listen to them.

Libra (Sept. 23-Oct. 22)

Many people aren’t always upfront about what they want from a relationship (and may not even know), so they’re frequently doomed to failure from the start. Yes, being 100% real and forthright will make you much, much less likely to get into a relationship in the first place—however, it will make the ones you do get into much, much more likely to succeed, since most of the elements of intimacy will be on the table from the beginning, and there’ll be fewer unwelcome surprises further down the line. Do you really want to waste more of your time? Or is it, finally, time to just get down to the business of being real?

Scorpio (Oct. 23-Nov. 21)

Scorpios thrive on secrets, at times in their lives. I agree the intrigue is all very exciting, however there are times when the naked truth is the only thing that will serve you. This is one of those. Forget the allure of mystery and all that; strip away the glamour and just be raw, real, and open. Ironically, this will be far more captivating in the long and short run. Enjoy the electrifying result! There’ll be time to add layers and subtlety later, but for now let the unadorned, unsubtle, and whole truth of who you are and what you’re about take the spotlight

Sagittarius (Nov. 22-Dec. 21)

Play to win. Getting something—be it job, lay, or romance—out of pure pity just isn’t your style. Don’t try to work the sympathy angle—you’ll feel dirty and undeserving, even if it works. This is about stepping up and claiming what you desire. Boldly asking for what you want is one thing—meekly begging for it is another thing entirely. Be strong, direct, and confident, not needy and overly humble. If you can’t be those things, figure out why—and, most importantly, how you can get to that powerful, self-assured place, because that’s where you want and need to be.

Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19)

Humans are naturally non-monogamous. That doesn’t mean we aren’t capable of monogamy (we have free will, after all), simply that it doesn’t come naturally to us biologically. Our closest relatives are generally what we would consider promiscuous, and much of our biology seems geared towards having multiple partners. I think it’s okay, even better, to acknowledge that monogamy is hard, and consequently be more forgiving of the occasional lapse, or build outlets for these urges into your relationship. This may not fit in with your romantic ideal—however, it may just be time to revise it, in the interest of your long-term happiness.

Aquarius (Jan. 20-Feb. 18)

Saying goodbye is never easy. It’s not usually something we want to do. Sometimes, however, it becomes unavoidable. Since it must happen, I suggest you do it properly. Don’t avoid it just because it’s painful. It’s going to happen one way or another, and if you shy away from the discomfort or anguish of it, you’ll regret it later. This is one experience there’s no easy way out of—the only way out is, unfortunately, through it. I’m sorry to say that this kind of hurt is part of life, my dear. Embrace it, even though it sucks—it’s also a sign that you’re still truly, deeply alive.

Pisces (Feb. 19-March 20)

I hate deodorant, perfume, and cologne. I’m not a huge fan of body odor, but I prefer someone’s natural scent to something artificial (and frequently headache-inducing). I sometimes encounter women who surround themselves with a choking cloud of cloying scent. I’m sure they think it smells lovely, but I find myself literally gasping for air and trying to get far away from them. I’m fairly certain that’s not the effect they’re going for. Look at the things you do. Ignore what they’re supposed to accomplish and pay attention to what they’re actually doing. If those things aren’t aligned, I can’t think of any earthly reason why you wouldn’t want to change things up.

Aries (March 21-April 19)

Allow people their comforts. Following a personal mandate to always be honest, authentic, and true doesn’t mean you need to go out of your way to prove God doesn’t exist, for example, even if that’s what you believe. Most of us nurse illusions (or delusions) to help get through some of the harder aspects of life. Be compassionate, especially if the circumstances are somewhat extreme. Stripping those illusions away can sometimes be liberating, but is more often cruel. Avoid doing so this week, even if it means biting your tongue, tacitly lying, or stepping out of the situation altogether.

Taurus (April 20-May 20)

You hardly mean to be threatening, but there are times when you can be quite intimidating. Realize that. It’s not just the faint of heart who are daunted by your strength; you may be putting off some amazing people you’d really enjoy having around. Do you really want to deprive yourself of all those great folks and the cool shit they’d bring with them? That’s not to say you should make yourself weak in any way—however, focusing on making yourself more approachable, warm, and friendly might be a good thing to focus on this week.

Gemini (May 21-June 20)

As much as you’d like to be a magical legend in your own time, trying to convince people you shit rainbows and ride shooting stars isn’t going to work right now. Don’t look now, but your humanity is showing. This week, focus on being humble, grounded, and just plain real. You don’t need to downplay all the stuff that’s great about you; just remember you put on your pants one leg at a time, just like everyone else. Don’t feel pressure to knock everyone’s socks off right off the bat. There’s plenty of time for that later, and no one is in any rush.

Cancer (June 21-July 22)

What you were is not necessarily who you are now. You may have changed without truly realizing it. This is a good week to question long-held assumptions about your identity, your desires, and even your beliefs. Many of them probably still hold true; however you may have moved on from some without noticing—continuing to pretend they’re accurate is a sort of lie. Even though the one who stands to get hurt the most from such a falsehood is you, there are others at stake; that’s why getting to the raw truth of things is important. Focus on that this week.

To contact Caeriel send E-mail to:
sign.language.astrology@gmail.com.


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