The Docket: 06/16

The Docket

By Researched and reported by Amanda Dee

Keep it in your pants

A police officer was dispatched to the scene of a theft that transpired a few days prior. The female caller said she and her ex-boyfriend (the report does not say exactly when the “ex” was added, but one can estimate) were lying on the couch in the home they share. The woman fell asleep and awoke to find her rent money missing. She said she did not see her ex-boyfriend commit the crime (most likely because her eyes were closed), but, while in Illinois for reasons unknown, he told her he put the money in her pants. The woman is pretty convinced he lied, since he snapped photos of the money and told a friend he took it.

Your No. 1 fan

Police were called to a children’s art gallery after a report of a stolen item. At about 1:20 p.m., according to the report, staff members were loading supplies from a truck into the back entrance of the building. While the workers were distracted, an electric fan sat just out of sight near the truck, ripe for the taking. In the five minutes everyone was inside the building, someone took their chance, and the fan—priced at $1. The staffer who reported the crime said he believes it was a local scrapper who wears glasses. The officer on the case relocated to a nearby recycling station and asked the employee working there to call in if anyone brings in a fan fitting the description of the stolen one.

Take your pants off at your own risk

Police were called after a head chef’s wallet was stolen from his pants. In the convention center where the victim works, he took his jeans off and hung them up in the office of the kitchen. The chef-victim headed home, where he realized he didn’t have his wallet—or his jeans. He drove back to find the jeans still in the office, but not in the exact position as he had left them. When he checked the pockets, he did not find his wallet. The office that once housed the jeans and wallet was guarded with locks, but the victim did not know if the room was locked at the time. The only ones with access to the room were the full-time kitchen employees and two of the day’s temporary workers, one of which complained—right before the victim called in to inquire about his pants—to the head manager that she was tired and her legs hurt from her pants rubbing her leg skin.

You say you’re just a friend

A 36-year-old man called an officer to report the theft of his Chevy, which was filled with multiple orange ladders. The man told the officer he suspects a juvenile female acquaintance who, according to the report, “is just a friend [of his girlfriend’s] who occasionally hangs out at his house.” The man also claimed the juvenile female acquaintance took his iPhone and 9mm handgun, which the report said were “just in the house somewhere” beforehand. The man said he had been in his bedroom when the friend who occasionally hangs out at his house was hanging out in the living room. The man, by some miracle, received a text from his neighbor telling him his garage door was open. When the man checked it out, his acquaintance, Chevy and ladders were gone. He then realized his phone and gun were also missing. The man’s girlfriend, who lives with him, later said that the suspect promised to give her a ride back home—in a car that wasn’t stolen—but she apparently bailed.

La prima

Someone reported a man and a woman who were “very intoxicated or on drugs” at 3:45 p.m. on a Friday. An officer went to the reported location, then found the two at a nearby bar. He recognized the drunken male described during the call as a suspect for a credit card theft and immediately called in for back up. Once the officers were on the scene, they noticed the male was holding a bottle of tequila in his right hand near his leg—low, near the ground. An officer asked him where he got the bottle, and the man said he bought it. After speaking to the bartender, the officer was surprised to learn the man had lied to him about buying the bottle of La Prima tequila that he was suspiciously trying to conceal behind his leg in front of law enforcement. In his defense, he said he was just trying to give his female friend some more to drink. The man was handcuffed and booked on theft for tequila.

Reach DCP freelance writer Amanda Dee at

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Reach DCP Editor Amanda Dee at

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