Dayton’s police blotter, reported verbatim

by Amanda Dee

Summer fling

The complainant was working in the cooler section at a convenience store when a “white male peaked [sic] her interest,” according to the report. She started “watching the male go up and down the isles [sic].” Then, “she observed him take a drink from the cooler.” He walked around some more, and, suddenly, he no longer held the refreshing beverage in his hand. The man wore a tan button down under a dark hoodie with shorts—and Crocs. The man’s plates traced him to a bowling alley, where records show he is a tournament player.

Two loons, one stone

The victim reported her zebra print wallet missing. It had been sitting on the bed in her bedroom upstairs, and then it wasn’t. The woman suspects her ex-fiance. She told officers they “must catch [him] in the act.” She wasn’t too happy he wouldn’t “face immediate punishment,” though. Since she had officers there, she decided to make another complaint about her “psycho,” “now ex-neighbor.”

One man’s trash…

One of the victims, a park employee who does lawn maintenance, reported property stolen from their truck. He and his partner left their backpacks in the car when they went to mow the lawn that day. The man’s partner said she noticed two potential suspects while they were mowing: The first, a teen in a T-shirt and baggy shorts and the second, a “clean shaven teen” wearing “loose baggy cotton trousers.” When they finished working and returned to the truck, their packs were missing. However, the first victim soon found the packs in a nearby alley. According to the report, the only property missing from the man’s pack was a key to his car–and a false front tooth.

Hook, line, sinker

Officers arrived to meet the victim, who informed them he sent his “trusted longtime friend” to a pawnshop that evening to sell his vintage fishing pole. The man estimated the pole’s value at $300 but expected to sell it for somewhere between $40 and $50. The “trusted longtime friend” said he would return to the man’s house with the money from the sale before he went to work that night. But he never showed and stopped answering his phone. The victim said he was not aware of his “trusted longtime friend’s” current address.

Love thy neighbor

Officers responded to a call of breaking and entering in a man’s detached garage. The suspect managed to take 40 boxes from the garage—filled with $10,000-worth of laminate flooring… The victim said he really “didn’t want to point fingers without proof” but pointed his finger at one of the neighbors. Officers may have also been thinking, “How the hell?”

Grand theft auto

A man called in a theft of one of his vehicles. He showed the responding officer the screen to the back patio, which had been cut and broken into. Nothing from the house was stolen, but a car that had once been on the back porch was no longer there. The model? A red Power Wheels Jeep.

Just trynna hang

A woman told officers she returned home from work that afternoon to find two of her hanging planter baskets missing from her front porch. She contacted several neighbors on a social media neighborhood watch page to see if anyone had any leads, to no avail. Also missing: a red dog leash, which had been tied around a pillar under the hanging baskets.

Mom knows best

Officers arrived to find the victim and some “rock dust,” according to the report. The victim shared that the mother of his children busted his windshield, in front of several witnesses. When officers inquired about the residence of the mother of his children, he told them it just so happens she lives at the same apartment complex as him. (However, the car’s registration was in his wife’s name, so she may be the real victim here.)

Reach DCP Editor Amanda Dee at

Tags: , , ,

Amanda Dee
Reach DCP Editor Amanda Dee at

No comments yet.

Leave a Reply

Got an Opinion?


We are interested to hear what you think.  Please send us a message.  

The St. Vincent de Paul relief mission continues


  Gateway Shelter for Women and Families on W. Apple St is ready to help 24-hours a day.  By Tim […]

Mulling the merits of Merit Grill


Wide variety compromised by some puzzling choices The Merit Grill’s Carne Asada substituted sirloin for skirt steak, but the salsa, […]

Bread Baking Demystified

IMG_6577 v2

The secrets to a delicious loaf of bread are in the details The process of properly kneading bread dough includes […]

It’s happening in Troy


Jazz vocalist Vanessa Rubin Music at The Troy-Hayner Center The Troy-Hayner Cultural Center is welcoming the arrival of spring with […]

A tradition of storytelling

shannon mcnally 1 - sebastian smith

Shannon McNally at Newport’s Southgate House Revival Singer-songwriter Shannon McNally By Dave Gil de Rubio Songwriting has always had a […]