Archive | Law and Disorder RSS feed for this section

The Docket: 06/30

Dayton’s police blotter, reported verbatim Researched and reported by Amanda Dee   Man sorry for accidentally lurking nude At 6:30 on a Monday morning, an “older white male completely naked except for a pair of socks” was lurking by a dumpster and “appeared to be confused.” Officers patrolled the area and noticed the nude man […]

Read More 0 Comments

The Docket: 6/23

Dayton’s police blotter, reported verbatim Researched and reported by Amanda Dee Subtlety is an art Dayton Police were monitoring a website known to have prostitution ads and found one in the Dayton area. The ad read, “Hey fellas! I’m back and ready for you! Hot, horny, and cumming back for more! As always, excellent references […]

Read More 0 Comments

The Docket: 06/16

The Docket By Researched and reported by Amanda Dee Keep it in your pants A police officer was dispatched to the scene of a theft that transpired a few days prior. The female caller said she and her ex-boyfriend (the report does not say exactly when the “ex” was added, but one can estimate) were […]

Read More 0 Comments

The Docket: 6/9

By: Amanda Dee Donut mess with me Police were called when a bus, marked with “safety and security” on the side, was stolen. It had apparently been abandoned after crashing into a dumpster behind a donut shop. The vehicle was found a week from Donut Day at around 10 p.m. The donut deviant fled after […]

Read More 0 Comments

The Docket: 06/02

Dayton’s police blotter, reported verbatim By Researched and reported by Amanda Dee Sex makes all the people go away A 25-year-old man came up to an officer and told him he needed help. The man told the officer he had driven to Dayton the day before to meet another man he had met on a […]

Read More 0 Comments

The Docket: 05/26

Dayton’s police blotter, reported verbatim By Researched and reported by Charles Grove A lot at steak A loss-prevention officer witnessed a man stick a pack of steaks down the front of his pants and then attempt to leave the store. The officer chased down the man, who retreated back into the store, dumped the steaks […]

Read More 0 Comments

The Docket: 05/19

Dayton’s police blotter, reported verbatim By Researched and reported by Charles Grove D’oh! The owner of a Dayton bar contacted police on a fraud complaint. An employee of his received a call on the company phone from someone claiming to be a DP&L employee. The caller told the employee the bar owed DP&L money and […]

Read More 0 Comments

The Docket: 05/12

Dayton’s police blotter, reported verbatim By Researched and reported by Charles Grove Dentists have fillings, too! Police officers responded to a call from a dentist’s office on an assault complaint. The dental technician and dentist were attempting to perform a root canal on a 36-year-old man, but the two-person team was having trouble during the […]

Read More 0 Comments

The Docket: 05/05

Dayton’s police blotter, reported verbatim By Researched and reported by Charles Grove Donkey wrong Police were flagged down by a 24-year-old female in regards to an incident with her sister’s boyfriend. When she flagged down police she was wearing only a bra and sweat pants. After getting home so she could clothe herself, the woman […]

Read More 0 Comments

The Docket: 04/28

Dayton’s police blotter, reported verbatim By Researched and reported by Charles Grove Balls of steel Officers responded at 4:45 a.m. to an attempted robbery complaint. The two female victims told police they were walking through a parking lot when a blue PT Cruiser pulled up very quickly toward the two and stopped. The driver jumped […]

Read More 0 Comments

News of the weird: 06/30

By Chuck Shepherd   What Cannibals Can Teach Us Researchers studying the human-brain-eating Fore tribe of Papua New Guinea reported […]

Advice Goddess: 6/30

By Amy Alkon   Owe, Baby, Baby My girlfriend always cries that she’s “broke.” I just ended up buying her […]

The Docket: 06/30

Dayton’s police blotter, reported verbatim Researched and reported by Amanda Dee   Man sorry for accidentally lurking nude At 6:30 […]

Chew on this: 06/30

Back-of-the-envelope nutrition By Jayne Powers   From picking quality carbohydrates to protein powders and dietary supplements, there are scores of […]

Advice Goddess: 6/23

By Amy Alkon Rise And Spine My fiancé is good friends with his ex-girlfriend from college. (We’re all in our […]

30 feet of Abe

Lincoln’s legacy lives on in Troy By John Hamilton Photo: A monumental “Modern Man” discusses the Gettysburg Address with a […]