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The Docket: 3/15/16

Dayton’s police blotter, reported verbatim by Amanda Dee Now you saw me Officers were called to the corner near a pawnshop to find a man sporting an Ohio State T-shirt “trying to sell a saw with a company logo on it.”  Officers were on the lookout for the man, who fled in a maroon Buick […]

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The Docket 3/8/16

Dayton’s police blotter, reported verbatim by Amanda Dee  No butts about it An officer was driving on patrol when he noticed seven or eight individuals fighting in a parking lot in front of a gay nightclub. As he drove toward the tussle, the group stopped the brawling—except for one man, who continued throwing punches. The […]

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The Docket 3/1/16

Dayton’s police blotter, reported verbatim by Amanda Dee Mud Monster strikes again The victim and her husband had been out of the house for about 30 minutes when her mother dropped by. The mother knew something was not quite right because the backdoor had been kicked wide open and her daughter’s TV was gone. Most […]

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The Docket 2/23/16

Dayton’s police blotter, reported verbatim by Amanda Dee For the highest court Officers met with the pastor who called in the crime. He observed that one of the doors of the church had been forced open. According to the report, “he believed he may have info of who broke in.” The pastor noticed footprints and […]

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The Docket 2/16/16

Dayton’s police blotter, reported verbatim Probably not pooping  By Amanda Dee Officers were called to a convenience store. The call comments instructed the officers to “check for a [white male], [black] trench coat stole beer and is in bath room [sic] drinking the beer. Is still on seen [sic].” When officers arrived and knocked on […]

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The Docket 2/9/16

Dayton’s police blotter, reported verbatim by Amanda Dee Another woman deals with another creep The female victim of unrelenting male advances summed the incident up concisely in her report: “I’ve asked the person to quit contacting me and sending text messages. He continues to send text messages and threats.” This is one recent case in […]

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The Docket 2/2/16

Dayton’s police blotter, reported verbatim by Amanda Dee *69 A woman started receiving texts from an unknown number. The first line of the first text read, “U really hate me so much U F with my household and my kids livelihood?” Then, the sender clarified in the second line of the message: “OK this is […]

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The Docket

Dayton’s police blotter, reported verbatim by Amanda Dee The loads we carry Two officers were dispatched to check on a public restroom. Witnesses on site reported someone had been in there for “an extended period of time.” One of the officers did what anyone would do to check on the status of a long-term bathroom […]

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The Docket 1/19

The peddling pirate Two officers were on patrol when they noticed a man riding an orange bicycle on the sidewalk. They pulled over by the biking man and asked him to stop and step off his vehicle. They informed him they stopped him because he was riding his bike on the sidewalk but ultimately patted […]

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The Docket 01/12/16

Infant disguised as adult man Another man walked into a store and committed another crime. The cashier who checked him out only rung up one item, but when the man was leaving the store, he was holding something other than the item he purchased: a 4 Loco. The cashier confirmed the man didn’t have the […]

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The Docket

Dayton’s police blotter, reported verbatim By Amanda Dee Girls just wanna have fun A woman stuffed her pockets full of items from a store and attempted to walk out without paying. When the officer on duty confronted her, telling her she needed to come with him to the security, she asked why. He said, “You […]

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The Docket 12/29/15

Dayton’s police blotter, reported verbatim by Amanda Dee The year of 2015 had its fair share of trials and tribulations. CDs were stolen, Christmas decorations set aflame, and plenty of verbal abuse was dealt. But most remarkably, this year, the Miami Valley was home to a red meat epidemic. Steaks went missing, jerky was looted, […]

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The Docket 12/22/15

Dayton’s police blotter, reported verbatim by Amanda Dee How the Grinch stole Minion, Hello Kitty A woman had left her home in the morning and returned that afternoon to find what the Whos found when their village was ransacked. The tree: gone. A Hello Kitty bike, a Hello Kitty helmet, Hello Kitty body wash, a […]

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The Docket: 12/15/15

Penis envy A woman called in to report vandalism. Someone (or some ones) had painted “DICK” on a side of her house. The woman suspects two of her son’s ex-friends because  “when [her son] doesn’t play with them, they get ‘crazy.’” She also suspects this because her son’s new and improved friend said the two […]

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The Docket

Dayton’s police blotter, reported verbatim by Amanda Dee   The sweet escape Two white men entered a convenience store and took approximately six bags of Snickers bites, six bags of Musketeer bites, one bag of Milky Way bites, six bags of Kit Kat bites, six bags of Twix bites, six bags of Milky Way minis, […]

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The Docket 12/1/15

Dayton’s police blotter, reported verbatim by Amanda Dee Not your ’bra Two officers who “were both in the uniform of the day which included a long sleeve shirt and turtle necks” were on duty when they got a robbery call. The two suspects of the robbery sought cover in an RTA hub. As the officers […]

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Law & Disorder: The Docket 9/19

L&D

Major key Last weekend a local couple was watching TV in their living room, having a relaxing evening, when suddenly […]

Law & Disorder: The Docket 9/12

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Jesus take the wheel A local couple recently decided to visit their church on a particularly warm and muggy Sunday […]

Law & Disorder: The Docket 9/5

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Flightless In a local park, police were dispatched to the crime scene. A woman called the police when she realized […]

The Docket: 8/29

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Stolen in a nanosecond Just last week a woman visited her local sheriff’s office to place a tip on a […]

Law & Disorder: The Docket 8/22

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Totally secure knot …not In a local home a garage door was broken into. This garage door was perfectly secured […]