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The Docket 10/13

Cat fight A “female named Genevieve AKA Jenny,” valued at an estimated $100, has been kidnapped. The caller who reported the kidnapping told the officer her daughter called her and informed her that a “friend” stole Jenny, one of the two females the family adopted from the  street. The mother said the “friend” has been […]

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The Docket: 10/06

Dayton’s police blotter, reported verbatim by Amanda Dee Ain’t nobody got time for this An officer on patrol spotted a man he knew had previously been trespassed from public property on that public property. The trespassed man then walked right in front of the officer’s cruiser. The officer stepped out of his vehicle and told […]

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The Docket 09/29

Dayton’s police blotter, reported verbatim By Amanda Dee ‘Not in fact a crack whore’ At about 5:20 p.m. an officer responded to a call of criminal damaging. The victim told the officer that someone had slashed the back tires of her 1991 Chevrolet Cavalier. The words “crack whore” were also scratched into the hood.  The […]

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The Docket 09/22

Dayton’s police blotter, reported verbatim By Amanda Dee You can’t handle the ‘truth’ The victim reached police on a grand theft auto call. She had parked her gold/tan 2001 Lincoln Town Car with “a lot of black Duck Tape holding of the front end together” (unrelated to this incident) in the driveway of her friend’s […]

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The Docket: 09/15

Dayton’s police blotter, reported verbatim by Amanda Dee A magician never reveals his secret When taking out money from his pocket while he was waiting in line, a customer in a convenience store accidentally dropped $60. A man behind him then casually covered the money with his foot. He then bent down and swiped it. […]

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The Docket 09/08

Dayton’s police blotter, reported verbatim Love thy neighbor After his neighbor threatened him with a knife, a 42-year-old man decided to get the authorities involved. The man checked his mailbox at about 8:30 p.m., when his dog ran past him into his neighbor’s yard. The dog sat by the neighbor’s kids, who the man considered […]

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The Docket: 09/01

Dayton’s police blotter, reported verbatim by Amanda Dee  Frenemies A man hailed a police cruiser and said he had just been robbed—by someone he thought he knew. He was giving his friend a ride, when the friend asked him to stop and drop him off in a nearby alley. The man got out of the […]

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The Docket: 08/04

Dayton’s police blotter, reported verbatim Researched and reported by Amanda Dee I said, ‘excuse me’ A man called in on a trespassing complaint at about 10 p.m., not the time to intrude in the space “where he keeps a lot of items like table saws and extra scrap aluminum metal,” but here we are. The […]

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The Docket: 07/28

Dayton’s police blotter, reported verbatim By Researched and reported by Amanda Dee   What’s at steak? “$85.85 worth of meet [sic],” apparently. An officer arrived to a grocery store on a theft call and asked where exactly the crime took place. The loss prevention employee disclosed that the dog food section was the scene of […]

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The Docket: 07/21

Dayton’s police blotter, reported verbatim By Researched and reported by Amanda Dee Nailed it The owner of a nail salon called police when an ex-employee started stealing from her business. She told the responding officer that she fired an employee the morning she was a “no call, no show.” She didn’t take it well. At […]

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The Docket: 07/14

Dayton’s police blotter, reported verbatim By Researched and reported by Amanda Dee   Caught in the act Police were dispatched to a grocery store on a theft complaint. According to the complainant, four young males were loitering in the soda aisle, but when he caught up with the crew, half of them had moved on […]

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The Docket: 07/07

Dayton’s police blotter, reported verbatim By Researched and reported by Amanda Dee   The cops tho An officer responded to a report of a stolen cell phone. The victim said her boyfriend last used her cell phone in May, right before he was arrested. Since the arrest, the phone was in the custody of the […]

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The Docket: 06/30

Dayton’s police blotter, reported verbatim Researched and reported by Amanda Dee   Man sorry for accidentally lurking nude At 6:30 on a Monday morning, an “older white male completely naked except for a pair of socks” was lurking by a dumpster and “appeared to be confused.” Officers patrolled the area and noticed the nude man […]

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The Docket: 6/23

Dayton’s police blotter, reported verbatim Researched and reported by Amanda Dee Subtlety is an art Dayton Police were monitoring a website known to have prostitution ads and found one in the Dayton area. The ad read, “Hey fellas! I’m back and ready for you! Hot, horny, and cumming back for more! As always, excellent references […]

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The Docket: 06/16

The Docket By Researched and reported by Amanda Dee Keep it in your pants A police officer was dispatched to the scene of a theft that transpired a few days prior. The female caller said she and her ex-boyfriend (the report does not say exactly when the “ex” was added, but one can estimate) were […]

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The Docket: 6/9

By: Amanda Dee Donut mess with me Police were called when a bus, marked with “safety and security” on the side, was stolen. It had apparently been abandoned after crashing into a dumpster behind a donut shop. The vehicle was found a week from Donut Day at around 10 p.m. The donut deviant fled after […]

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Law & Disorder: The Docket 9/19

L&D

Major key Last weekend a local couple was watching TV in their living room, having a relaxing evening, when suddenly […]

Law & Disorder: The Docket 9/12

L&D

Jesus take the wheel A local couple recently decided to visit their church on a particularly warm and muggy Sunday […]

Law & Disorder: The Docket 9/5

L&D

Flightless In a local park, police were dispatched to the crime scene. A woman called the police when she realized […]

The Docket: 8/29

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Stolen in a nanosecond Just last week a woman visited her local sheriff’s office to place a tip on a […]

Law & Disorder: The Docket 8/22

L&D

Totally secure knot …not In a local home a garage door was broken into. This garage door was perfectly secured […]